We think it's a....

girl. That's right, the ultra sound didn't go so great today but the technician and I are guessing it's a girl. The technician was not thrilled that I was there around 18 weeks and not 20, but she agreed to let us see the baby and she checked a few things out while my mom, sisters and Gavin were there. Everything seemed to look okay as far as she could tell, nothing alarming, but she was having some trouble seeing everything with the baby so little. The baby would not cooperate and turn around and had her legs together the whole time. I know she didn't want to say the sex for sure, because you couldn't see much but I told her I was there for Gavin and he really wants a brother- she then asked me what I was thinking and I said girl and she agreed. Gavin was happy to see the baby and was just fine when I told him we think it's a girl. I knew I had him pretty well prepared, but I knew it would still be difficult for me to know that I wouldn't be giving Gavin the brother he really wanted. It was a stressful day for me, I was really hoping to know for sure and even though I have thought it was a girl from early on, there was always that little hope that I could give Gavin a brother and Kyle another son. I know that it is all in God's hands and that this baby will be the perfect completion to this family. I was happy to see that it looks healthy and look forward to another ultrasound to see more. I did schedule one for April 6, so we should be able to see the sex of the baby by then and get some pictures. I was happy to have been there with my family and Gavin was able to see his new little baby. God is good and I know I will be just fine, now if this migraine would go away and I hopefully will feel much better tomorrow (I have had migraines during this pregnancy and they are at there worse when I am emotional or overwhelmed). This pregnancy has definitely been a stressful, emotional and at times even depressing- I can't explain it, I have never felt this way during my other pregnancy's but this one has really taken it's toll. I am sure the fact that at the beginning I knew Kyle would be gone and now that he is hasn't helped my mental state, but I feel God all around me and know that He is walking me through this. I have actually started to feel more like myself the past 2 weeks, but today was hard, I am just glad there is tomorrow. Nothings really wrong, so I hate to complain I have so much to be thankful for so I keep trying to focus on all those wonderful blessings.

Today was also difficult since I had to say good bye to my family. They came up from Texas on Sat. and it was so wonderful to have them around. You get so used to being so far from your family, but when you are with them you realize what you are missing and saying good bye is never easy. I will post some pictures from this week as soon as I get some, I wasn't very good at taking any, but my sister did so I will try to share those with you.

Just one more thing, I have been having computer problems so that has not helped my blogging efforts- I hate getting on here, never knowing if it is going to work. So I will do my best and hopefully the computer will magically fix itself.